It was 11:00 P.M., and I was "history." It had been a particularly stress-filled day. I could hear the sheets on my bed calling me, and all I wanted to do was to lie down and let them grab me.The only problem was that our 16-year-old son, Benjamin, was sprawled across the foot of our bed. He wanted to talk.
I'm not a perfect father, but I do try to learn from my previous errors. And I have learned that when a teenager wants to talk, you'd better seize the moment-even when you're semi-comatose!
I leaned forward on my side, looked Benjamin in the eye, and said, "What's up?"
Benjamin proceeded to give me an unbelievable description of a seminar he'd attended on how to counsel his peers about preventing AIDS. He had been selected by his school counselors to be one of six students to represent his high school for the seminar, sponsored by a well-known organization. This conservative organization's official position is that "abstinence" is the best prevention for AIDS. So Barbara and I had signed the parental release form.
At the seminar, five boring minutes were given to abstinence. These adult "educators" all but told the kids, "Hey, we know you don't have any character. We know you can't control yourselves. So here's how you can do it creatively and 'safely.'"
Now, they didn't use these exact words, but they might as well have. What followed was 60 scintillating, titillating and descriptive minutes devoted to creative "safe sex." It was the most graphic public description and explanation of heterosexual and homosexual sex that I have ever heard.
By the time my son had finished sharing and showing me all the material he had been given, I was fully awake. And angry.
I also was faced with a choice. There were a lot of things going on in my life at the time-a lot of responsibilities and a lot of problems to solve. This was the last thing I wanted to worry about.
But this was my child. Was I going to let it pass, or was I going to get involved? I'll tell you tomorrow...