God created man and woman to be together; it's Satan who is the father of isolation and loneliness. A veteran member of the Billy Graham Crusade team once told me that the number one need that Graham speaks on is loneliness. Even when surrounded by thousands or millions of people, we feel alone, detached. We yearn for intimacy.Yet Satan sometimes succeeds in isolating married couples and other family members from each other. The impact of his tactics cannot be understated. Isolation makes suffering unbearable. Your heart can grow cold, indifferent to things of ultimate importance.
Isolation can make you vulnerable, bringing a loss of perspective-about self, life and others. Isolation can cause you to conjure up wild imaginations about your mate's thoughts, plans or motivations. You may even contemplate taking your life.
Isolation is particularly dangerous for a teenager. When our daughter Ashley was about 14 years old I asked her what she felt the results of isolation were. She responded, "When I'm isolated from others, I feel empty and cold-I feel alone and like I don't have value."
When our son Benjamin was a teenager, I told him, "One of the most important issues in our relationship is that we not become isolated from one another. That's what the enemy wants. He wants you to become isolated from us and think that we are your enemy, that we don't have your best interests in mind.
The solution to isolation is the "I-Solution." I must take responsibility for my part in relationships. I must ask for forgiveness when I've hurt someone and they want to hide from me.
The difficulty with applying the I-Solution, of course, is that first word, "I." The I-Solution involves dying to self, giving up my anger and pride, and the right to revenge. That's the key to defeating this enemy of intimacy.