I am convinced that great marriages and great families are rooted in self-denial. In a truly biblical, Christian marriage, both people are willing to give up their lives for one another in order to love their mate properly.During the early years of our marriage, I remember looking in the rearview mirror of the car as I pulled out to go fishing with several of our children one Saturday. Barbara was standing on the porch, left with a couple of kids in diapers while I went off to the lake with the older kids to have a good time.
While I was sitting in that boat, not catching anything, I continued to think about Barbara. I thought, You know, I am pleasing myself, but I have not done a good job of pleasing her. I realized I needed to give up some of my hobbies for awhile in order to please her and reduce her burden.
In our nation's economy, one usually determines the value of a piece of merchandise or a service by how much one has to give up, or sacrifice, to gain it. If my son wishes to buy a new basketball, it will cost him a couple of weekends of freedom in order to complete enough chores to earn the money to pay for it.
In a similar fashion, your mate often interprets how much you love or value him or her by how much you are willing to sacrifice for him or her.
For the woman trying to please her husband, it has often been said that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Why not cook the foods he enjoys? Be careful not to become his mother, feeding him only what is "good for him." Spoil him a little.
A husband can please his wife by finding out what her number one need is, and then helping to meet that need if he can. It may be as simple as a walk and time to talk with her. Or as complex as a child that has her under his or her control.
The main concern here is to do the right thing: Please your spouse.